Thursday, October 13, 2011

The Sage considers disturbed friends and family

Today's Seekers may be found here: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2011/10/dear_prudence_my_husband_wants_a_gun_but_i_hate_firearms_.html

1. The first Seeker is married to a gentleman who believes that children should not be reared in a home in which there are no arms for protection; whereas, the Seeker herself believes such arms would be too dangerous to have in a home with children.

The Sage fears that this may be an irreconcilable difference. It is true that some homes with weapons have managed to turn away or disable intruders, but many homes also have endured tradegy when curious children managed to find carefully or carelessly hidden weapons. If no agreement can be reached, even with the assistance of a trained marital mediator, it may be necessary to cut losses and to discuss this dilemma with the next potential life partner.

2. The next Seeker was recently wed, an occasion at which one guest attacked and hospitalized another.

The Sage believes that you are overly concerned with etiquette in light of this fiasco. You are not responsible for an apology to guests who had only to witness this ordeal, as you are at least as upset as they. A kind gesture would be to applogize and to offer to return the cash gift from the victim of the attack to help toward his expenses. You might consider offering to assist with bail for the assailant, if you believe he should be set temporarily free, with the money received from him. The Sage is reminded that there is a reason some families disallow copious amounts of alcohol at various functions.

3. Our next Seeker wishes to surprise a friend with chemotherapy-induced baldness with a wig made of her own hair.

The Sage sees the beginning of a new trend. After surprising this friend with the unasked gift of new hair, you might surprise another with an unannounced donation of a kidney. While this may be intended as a loving gesture, the element of surprise promises an extremely awkward moment for the recipient.

4. The final Seeker is remiss to visit her distance family, whom she sees as slovenly and whose house she views as unsafe.

The Sage reminds the Seeker that one cannot make another person do something they do not wish to do. You cannot force your family members to come to visit you, nor can you force them to change their ways. If they refuse to visit you, your options are to cut off trips between your homes or to find other accommodations when visiting them. Alternately, accept that a few nights without a smoke detector are unlikely to cause your demise, and that they have lived safely for years with unlocked doors. Portable smoke detectors and travel locks* are an inexpensive investment, relative to the entire cost of your trip.

* http://studenttravel.about.com/od/womenstudenttravelers/tp/inroomsafety.htm

Monday, October 10, 2011

15 proclamations

http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2011/10/dear_prudence_my_boyfriend_neglected_to_tell_me_he_has_herpes_.single.html

The Oracle has taken pity on the younger Seekers and has expandsed a few answers.

1. Those who wait long to tell important news often have other news waiting to be told.

2. There may be more than one way to recover what one has lost. (Make a claim against the auto insurance, and double check with the travel agent about medical emergencies.)

3. Those who feel the world is their oyster often go hungry.

4. Those who risk the lives of others sometimes find their own lives forfeit.

5. Those who hide from the world sometimes are hiding from someone in particular. (Maybe he's married.)

6. Good fortune may be around the corner, provided attractions are mutual.

7. Instability is never a good example for a young child.

8. So it has been said.

9. So it has been said.

10. Far easier it is to blame bad decisions on the innocent than on oneself.

11. Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion. (Proverbs)

12. It is far better to keep silent and be thought a fool, than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt. (Popular wisdom)

13. So it has been said.

14. Not all cries in the darkness need to be answered.

15. Better late than never. (Chaucer)